tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12908849975573828732024-03-12T19:05:24.198-07:00Love what God gave you. He gave them to you for a reason.There are a lot of people who call you by your name.
But there is only one person who can make it sound so damn special.Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.comBlogger35125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-61778066685694551012012-03-09T18:56:00.003-08:002012-03-09T18:58:15.733-08:00Heber Robert McBride...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgczquM91DdyvjX_PMDEKTbibcY-C90rTo_cNj1J-gAIPzfSor39_1g0EFHM_8DlxGTrMd9IC55YTo3BZNcq9TmSc-Rodk31n6oV2bnyctQwY7jJqDo17Gy-nZpiBTPka8CHxi6ZcDbdNY/s1600/Heber+Robert+McBride+with+Family..jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgczquM91DdyvjX_PMDEKTbibcY-C90rTo_cNj1J-gAIPzfSor39_1g0EFHM_8DlxGTrMd9IC55YTo3BZNcq9TmSc-Rodk31n6oV2bnyctQwY7jJqDo17Gy-nZpiBTPka8CHxi6ZcDbdNY/s320/Heber+Robert+McBride+with+Family..jpg" width="222" /></a></div><br />
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<span style="font-size: 78%;">LIFE SKETCH OF<br />
<br />
HEBER ROBERT MCBRIDE<br />
(1843-1925)<br />
Biographical Material Collected<br />
by<br />
Margaret Howard McBride Bachman<br />
Arranged by<br />
Lyle Bachman</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-weight: bold;">Life Sketch</span><br />
10 September 1937<br />
<br />
In Churchtown, Lancashire, England, on May 13, 1843, Heber Robert McBride was born to Robert and Margaret Howard McBride. The second of their five children, he was destined to spend only the first few years of his life in his native city, because, along with the other members of his family, he early became a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, and, like them, was forced to seek refuge among his brethren in a more tolerant land.<br />
<br />
After his baptism by Thomas Cass and confirmation by Spicer Crandle on July 10, 1854, in his birthplace, he and his parents were so bitterly persecuted by non-believers that they were obliged to leave their home and seek companionship among others of their own faith. Making their way to Liverpool, they arranged passage and embarked on their journey to the United States of America. Hardly had the vessel weighed anchor when mutiny flared among the crew. The rebels chased the first mate into his cabin, but he returned brandishing two pistols, threatening to kill the first one who moved. At his orders, the next officer ran up the flag of distress, which brought boats and officials from the shore. The mutineers were hand-cuffed and jailed. Three days were required to recruit new seamen and prepare to leave again.<br />
<br />
The second embarkation was made peacefully, as the ship and its passengers set out on their five-weeks' journey to the New World. At Boston, Massachusetts, where they disembarked, the McBrides found themselves to be the first Mormons to land there. Joining some six hundred other saints, who had gathered from all points for the purpose, they entrained for Iowa City, Iowa, to continue their journey westward with the Martin and Taylor Handcart Company being organized at that point. They were transported in cattle and freight cars, making a regular stop at Chicago, Illinois, and a forced stop at Rock Island, where the bridge had been burned out and it was necessary to ferry the train across.<br />
<br />
The handcart company was encamped two miles from Iowa City, but no provision had been made to meet and transport the group from the train to the camp. Many felt like turning back, and surely would have done had their faith not been so invincible. Just at night-fall they set out on foot for the camp, but were soon deluged by a terrible storm. The thunder and lightning were worse than most of them had ever experienced. Some lost their way, Heber among them. Climbing to a near-by hill-top, he espied a fire in the distance and made for it through the water and wet grass in his path. On approaching it, he observed a large group of people huddled in its warmth. They were Saints with whom he had traveled, and the fire was the center of the handcart encampment. He was so overjoyed to be among friends in a free land that all the perils and hardships of the journey were forgotten.<br />
<br />
Although the schedule called for immediate departure of the entire Company for Utah, a blunder on the part of those in charge delayed them a full six weeks. But even after the error had been corrected, the situation was far from ideal. The McBride family, seven in all, were given a small handcart incapable of carrying even the meagerest of the effects which they had brought with them from England. Nearly all of their clothing and most of their bedding were left behind with the understanding that it would be freighted and delivered to them upon their arrival in Utah. But they never saw it again, even though it would have added materially to their well-being both during their pathetic trek and after their disheartening arrival in the Valley.<br />
Along with six others, their family of seven were assigned to occupy one small tent as sleeping quarters; then they set out, with Florence as their first stop. Another blunder causing three more long weeks of delay at this point found them hardly on the way but the season well advanced. Thereafter, for the first part of their trek, however, things went quite well, although they were obliged to wade every stream except the Platt [sic] River. Here they were ferried across. It was the last big stream in their path for the rest of their travels.<br />
<br />
Their arrival at Fort Laramie, Wyoming, almost coincided with the onslaught of winter. As their trail led upward into the mountains, the weather became colder and more disagreeable and their provisions fewer. They were limited to rations of one pint of flour a day for each family. This was stirred with water obtained from melting snow and each member of the family sipped it by turns until it was consumed. Heber's mother became very ill and his father weaker and weaker because he would deny himself what little nourishment he could have derived from the pitiful ration in order to give more to the children. Soon he could pull the cart no longer, so it fell the lot of Heber, then 14, and his older sister, Janette, 16, to perform the task. They would pull first their mother, then their father; then both would walk until they collapsed from sheer exhaustion. Placing them in the cart again, the two children would continue on as best they could, but they were young and weak and the trail was almost impassable. Many other members of the Company suffered similar trials, and soon death came to take its toll. Most of the men passed on, several at a time.<br />
<br />
One morning snow began to fall. The storm grew in intensity and continued unabated throughout the day and following night. It was bitter cold. The dawning of the second day brought no relief, but inflicted added misery on the McBride family when their father could not be found. Finally after some searching by the able-bodied men of the company, they discovered feet protruding from a snow drift. Digging into it, they uncovered his body and those of thirteen other men, all frozen to death. Thus, the family were deprived of their father, who at the early age of 42, starved and froze to death on his way to join the Saints in Zion. Taking one of their last blankets, they wrapped him in it and reburied him in the drift. As they passed on, glancing back at times, they were horrified to see through their tears that wolves had found the spot and were devouring the corpse of their martyred father.<br />
<br />
There now remained only sufficient flour to ration four ounces to each family each day. Everyone was so cold and weak that none had courage to push forward. The snow fell continuously, blocking their path completely. But, at this juncture, when all had been abandoned, a stranger on horseback joined them with the glad news that teams and wagons were coming to meet them. Imbued with new life, they set out again and were soon out of the deep snow in the region of the river. Their mother's illness turned out to be smallpox, but the children could not stop, so they moved onward with the rest of the Company. They soon met the men coming to help them, and were given additional provisions.<br />
<br />
A pound of flour per day was the family ration for a short time, but, since the bulk of supplies had been left at Fort Bridger, Wyo., with the understanding that the Company was in the immediate vicinity, this amount was soon greatly reduced.<br />
<br />
At Devil's Gate, eighteen additional inches of snow and a freezing wind halted them. Heber's mother and the three smallest children were loaded into one of the wagons and he and Janette were left to pull the cart after the wagons had broken the trail. After two miles of this, the children were far behind, week and numb with cold. But, going as best they could despite their tears and sufferings, they managed to reach Sweet Water without being left too far in the rear Another group of wagons and men from Utah were awaiting them there. Taking the cart from the two children, some of them pulled it across the ice while others carried the exhausted youngsters to their family in a cave on the other side of the storm to shield them from the howling northern blast. There they fixed their tent, brought them wood and kindled them a fire to warm themselves. But the bad weather continued and the Company was held in this spot for so long that the daily ration was reduced to four ounces of flour apiece for all over twelve years and two ounces for those under. Death stalked among them again, and most of the Company who had survived the first siege succumbed before a third group from Utah succeeded in reaching them with sufficient provisions to furnish one-half pound of flour apiece to the few survivors.<br />
<br />
Taking as many of the Company as they could, among them Heber's mother and her three youngest children--these teamsters set out for Ogden, Utah, leaving Heber and Janette alone again to pull the cart. After two days of slow progress, they were met by more help from Salt Lake City; so, leaving their carts on the spot, they placed their few belongings in the wagons and left. They were given more to eat, were able to ride rather than walk, and were helped each night with their tents and wood-gathering. Thus, they finally reached Ogden, Utah.<br />
<br />
A log cabin of one room, containing nothing more than four blocks of wood to serve as chairs, was given the McBride family. By themselves at last, they looked at one another in wonder, at a loss as to what to do to keep from freezing and starving. But they were not puzzled for long because Brother Samuel Ferrin, one of the earlier pioneers who was now established as owner of a home and considerable property in the vicinity, came and took the entire family to his home. He was recently a widower, so he married Heber's mother and she settled down to caring for his seven motherless children as well as her own brood.<br />
<br />
With the coming of Spring, Heber obtained work on a farm, and he pursued that occupation for the rest of his life.<br />
<br />
In 1860, he was ordained an Elder by John Volker. Five years later he was called to go to the Platt River to help migrating Saints through the snow. On August 1, 1868, at the age of 25, he was married to Elizabeth Ann Burns in Eden, Utah, by John Riddle. In November of the same year, he and his wife were sealed in the Endowment House in Salt Lake City. Shortly after, on February 1, 1876 he took his family and joined several others who had been called by the Church authorities to settle the Little Colorado River country, but the venture proved a failure. Returning to Eden, Utah, which then became the family home, he pursued his occupation as a farmer and worked actively in the Church. He was ordained a Seventy in the 75th Quorum, Dec. 22, 1883, and a High Priest, Jan. 27, 1884, by L. W. Shurtliff in Eden. William Lake gave him his patriarchal blessing in Ogden. After serving as president of the YMMIA and as ward teacher, he was set apart by W. W. Taylor as First Counselor to Bishop David McKay. Then on October 15, 1885, he was set apart by John Henry Smith to serve as Counselor to Bishop Josiah Ferrin.<br />
<br />
On May 25, 1894 at the age of 43, his wife died, leaving him with seven children, none of them married. Four months later, in September, he married Elizabeth B. Gould, by whom he had five more children. With eight members of his family, he departed for Welling, Alberta, Canada, June 3, 1904, where he took up land and settled. He died there at the age of 82, on July 31, 1925, after having worked diligently at his occupation, served as a scout in the Black Hawk Indian war, as an Indian guard, and in minor and major church capacities. He had pioneered in many localities and contributed much to the advancement of Zion. At present (September 10, 1937) his descendants comprise 91 grandchildren, 42 great grandchildren, and 31 great, great grandchildren.<br />
<br />
Elizabeth Gould McBride passed away March 24, 1940 in Canada.<br />
<br />
Note: This edition was typed by Danel W. Bachman, 9 September 1995.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="font-weight: bold;">“Oh, Father, Father”</span><br />
<span style="font-weight: bold;">(Short Story of Heber McBride 1843 - 1925)</span><br />
<br />
<br />
Heber McBride, then 13 years old, traveled to the Salt Lake Valley in the Martin Handcart Company in 1856 with he parents, Robert and Margaret, and four brothers and sisters.<br />
<br />
The following incident, found in his memoirs, occurred one day after the company crossed the North Platte River, just west of present-day Casper, Wyo.<br />
<br />
“That evening as we crossed the Platte River for the last time it was very cold. The next morning there was about six inches of snow on the ground, then what we had to suffer can never be told. Father was very bad and could hardly sit up in the tent…. I managed to get father in one of the wagons. That was the last we ever saw of him alive….<br />
<br />
“(That evening) the snow was getting very deep and my sister and me had to pitch our tent and get some wood, but there were plenty of dry willows. After we had made mother as comfortable as possible, we went to find father, but the wind was blowing the snow so hard we could not see anything…. We did not find father that night.<br />
<br />
“The next morning the snow was about eighteen inches deep and awful cold. While my sister was preparing our little bite of breakfast I went to look for father, and found him under the wagon with snow all over him and he was stiff and dead. I felt as though my heart would burst as I sat down beside him in the snow and took his hand in mine and cried, “Oh, Father, Father.”<br />
<br />
“There we were, away from everything, away out on the plains with hardly anything to eat or wear, and father dead and mother sick; a widow with five children and hardly able to live from day to day. After I had my cry out I went back to the tent and told mother and the children. To try to write my feelings is out of the question.<br />
<br />
“We were not the only family called upon to mourn the loss of a father that morning, for there were thirteen men dead in camp.<br />
<br />
“The men that were able to do anything cleared off the snow and made a fire and thawed the ground and dug a hole and buried all in one grave. I can assure you that the men had no heart to do more, than they had to do.”<br />
<br />
(Source: Memoirs of Heber McBride, October 1856)<br />
Darvil B. McBride, Newport Beach, California<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="storyText">Mormon Pioneer Overland Travel, 1847–1868<br />
<b>Source of Trail Excerpt:</b>McBride, H[eber] R[obert], "Tounge nor Pen Can Never Tell the Sorrow: Heber McBride Describes the 1856 Martin Handcart Disaster," <i>Crossroads Newsletter</i>, spring 1994, 3-4. <b>Read Trail Excerpt:</b>was taken to Iowa and their we had to stay 3 or 4 weeks before we could start our journey as we were coming with handcarts[.] their seemed to be bad Management some where[.] got started and arrived at winter quarters of Mormon fame now called Florence[.] their we had to stay for 3 weeks through some more bad management[.] their was 7 of us in familey and all we had was one little handcart and that got to be to much for us before we got through[.] their were some wagnos to haul provisions for the Company and if any was sick to haul them and they did for a while but Mother took chills and fever[.] then our trouble began[.] she would walk as far as she could by holding on to the cart then we get her in to one of the wagons[.] the baby [aged two and turned three on the journey] we had to haul all the way[.] the next one was 6 years old then one 8 but they walked all the way till the snow got so deep they coulden they coulden walke but while the weather was good we got along very well but when food got scarce and it began to get cold the men began to give out[.] teams gave out and so many sick and dieing that they couldent all ride[.] then we were reduced to ½ pound of flour a day for grown people and 4 ounces for children under 12 years old[.] Father at last gave out and in the morning Father and Mother would start out to walk till one would give out and sit down or lay down till we came along and get them on the cart and till the other one was give out[.] then the one that was on the cart was rested then we would take the other one and one would walk by holding to the cart and we would not get into camp till after dark and we had to wade all the streams and the weather was getting very cold and snow falling a little everyday or 2[.] one morning I got father in a wagon and that was the last time we saw him alive[.] I went after we got the tent up but it was snowing very hard and I couldent find him so you will have to immagin how we felt[.] their were 3 other men in our tent[.] Wm Barton and wife and 2 children[,] 1 girl like my sister 15 or 16 years old[,] and 2 old men and my F[a]ther all died in one night[.] I think the 2 old men died like Father did[.] I went in the morning and found my father ded and frozzen stif covered in snow[.] whether he was dead and was put there or how he got there will never be known[.] tounge nor pen can never tell the sorrow and suffering[.] my sister[,] I and Mrs Barton got father to the tent[.] their was 2 families their in the snow and hardley anything to eat but their were men enough to bury the dead[.] Aran Jacksons father died at the same time[.] prhaps you know him[,] he lives on the bench there[in Ogden?] 13 men died that one night and all piled into one pit[.] all died by hardship and starvation and the snow and the cold was something awful and our clothing all about dun[.] when we went to bed we dident hav bedding to keep is warm[.] I have wondered many times since how it was we everd lived for my sister and I used [to] pray we could die to get out of our misery[.] the oxen began to die and then was di[s]tributed among the people[,] rawhide and all[.] we was then at the last crossing of the platte river[.] had to stay there several days so many dieng but had to try it again[.] when we got away from the river the snow was not so deep and before we got to sweetwater we met 5 teams from Utah but they came so much farther than they expected to that they were nearly out of provisons but they were workers[.] the[y] put the tents up and got wood and took care of Mother and the 3 little ones[.] we got to Devels [Devil's] Gate[.] it was so cold all day we could hardley make it but when we got there the tents were up and big fires burning[.] Sister and I cried for joy[.] it seemed so nice to have nothing to do but when we got up in the morning the snow was 18 inc[hes] deep and the north wind blowing hard and cold but the men came and took the tent down and fixed our load on our cart and they went ahead and broake the road[.] went about 2 miles and turend and crost s[w]eetwater[.] when we saw that we felt very bad to think we had to ford that stream and I dont think we could have made it in our week[e]ned condition but when we got there we was very much suprised for there were some men there[.] they carried us across[.] we went into a cove in the mountain and got out of the wind and when we got there the tent was up and Mother and Mrs barton [were] sitting by a good fire[.] the history of the Church says we onley staid their 2 days but that is a big mistake and I dont care who wrote it and I find they pas over the hand cart blunder very light for right their more died than any where on the road[,] for we was reduced to 4 ounces of flour and children 2 ounces[.] just think of it[,] out of a company[of] nearly 500 people[,] 144 dead and it looked like we would all die but some more teams came from Utah [and] then our trouble ended as far as handcarts was conserned for we left them all there[.] soon met more teams then we all got to ride and got to Utah[.] [I] was taken to Sammiul [Samuel Ferrin's] ferrins Ogden Dec 1856 taking about 7 months to make the trip and the family is all alive now in 1923 after all our hardship and our ages range from 68 to 83[.] take what you want from this tho as it may not be just what you want <br />
[<i>Signed</i>] H[eber] R[obert] McBride </div><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Mormon Pioneer Overland Travel, 1847–1868<br />
<b>Source of Trail Excerpt:</b>McBride, Peter Howard, [Life sketch], in Susan Arrington Madsen, <i>I Walked to Zion</i> [1994], 44-46.<b>Read Trail Excerpt:</b>We had to burn buffalo chips for wood, not a tree in sight, no wood to be found anywhere. Just dry earth and rivers. We children and old folks would start early so we wouldn't be too far behind at night. A great many handcarts broke down, oxen strayed away, which made traveling rather slow. Quite an undertaking to get nearly one thousand persons who had never had any camping experience to travel, eat, and cook over campfires. It took much patience for the captain to get them used to settling down at night and to get started in the morning. We saw a great many buffalo as we traveled up the Platte River. The people were forbidden to kill them, as it made the Indians angry. So they hired the Indians to kill what they needed to eat. An Indian sold a man a whole buffalo for five cents' worth of tobacco. Both parties were satisfied. Sometimes a herd of fifty thousand buffalo would cross the plains, and one time our company met three thousand Sioux Indians, all warriors all in war paint. Our people were much frightened, fear held the whole camp in its grip as they all expected to be annihilated. But their fears were groundless. They told our interpreters they were going to fight the Pawnee tribes. They wouldn't hurt us because we were mostly squaws and papooses. It would be cowardly to fight us, so they gave us the road. <br />
Much hunger and cold were experienced by these weary handcart travelers; all they had to eat was a little flour, which was cut to ¾ pound to a person. Many aged people died; even the young people could not stand the hardships. My baby sister [Margaret Alice] and I were even cut to less flour, and we were really hungry. Our teams gave out and died, and we were glad to eat the meat. I remember some men passed us one day and stopped to talk. They gave my baby sister some cookies. She carried them in her little pocket, and I was always with her and would tease for a bite. She would give me a taste once in a while, and it was so good. No cake I ever tasted since was ever so good. The exposure to cold rain, snow, and ice, pushing carts all day, the scarcity of food and wood caused many strong men to perish. <br />
A man by the name of Cyrus Wheelock, just returning from a mission to the Eastern States, was riding a horse. He carried some of the children across the river, even helped pull some of the handcarts by a rope fastened to his saddle. One time he had three little boys on his horse, one in front and two behind him. I was the last boy on that side of the river and tried to wade across. He told me to climb up behind the last boy behind his saddle, which I did. We crossed the river all right, then the horse leaped up the steep bank, and I slid off in the shallow water. I held on to the horse's tail and came out all right. <br />
That night the wind was blowing very cold, and the carts were sheltered behind a big bluff, but the snow drifted in and covered our tent. My father [Robert McBride] died that night. He had worked hard all day pushing and pulling handcarts through the icy waters of that dangerous river, helping many people with all their belongings to reach the other side. <br />
My mother [Margaret Ann Howard McBride] was sick all the way over, and my sister Jenetta had the worry of us children. She carried water from the river to do the cooking. Her shoes gave out, and she walked through the snow barefoot, actually leaving bloody tracks in the snow. Father was a good singer. He had charge of the singing in our company, and the night he died he sang a song, the first verse that reads "O Zion, when I think of you, I long for pinions like a dove, And mourn to think I should be so distant from the land I love." <br />
We camped at the Sweetwater River. A meeting was held. It was decided that we could go no further, the snow so deep and no food. We were doomed to starvation. They gave me a bone of an ox that had died. I cut off the skin and put the bone in the fire to roast. And when it was done some big boys came and ran away with it. Then I took the skin and boiled it, drank the soup, and ate the skin, and it was a good supper. <br />
The next day we had nothing to eat but some bark from trees. Later we had a terrible cold spell; the wind drifted so much I knew I would die. The wind blew the tent down. They all crawled out but me. The snow fell on it. I went to sleep and slept warm all night. In the morning I heard someone say, "How many are dead in this tent?" My sister said, "Well, my little brother must be frozen to death in that tent." So they jerked the tent loose, sent it scurrying over the snow. My hair was frozen to the tent. I picked myself up and came out quite alive, to their surprise. <br />
That day we got word that some teams were coming to meet us from the Valley. Three teams came that night. No one but a person having gone through what we had suffered can imagine what a happy moment it was for this "belated handcart company." Men, women, and children knelt down and thanked the Almighty God for our delivery from certain death. It put new life into all the Saints. The next day several more teams arrived, and there was room for all to ride. <br />
We finally arrived in Salt Lake City, November 30, 1856.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 100%;">“Oh, Father, Father”</span><b><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">(Short Story of Heber McBride 1843 - 1925)</span></span></b><b><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> </span></span></b><b><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> </span></span></b> <br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: 100%;">Heber McBride, then 13 years old, traveled to the Salt Lake Valley in the Martin Handcart Company in 1856 with he parents, Robert and Margaret, and four brothers and sisters.</span></div><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> </span></span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> The following incident, found in his memoirs, occurred one day after the company crossed the North Platte River, just west of present-day Casper, Wyo.</span></span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> </span></span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">“ That evening as we crossed the Platte River for the last time it was very cold. The next morning there was about six inches of snow on the ground, then what we had to suffer can never be told. Father was very bad and could hardly sit up in the tent…. I managed to get father in one of the wagons. That was the last we ever saw of him alive….</span></span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> </span></span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">“ (That evening) the snow was getting very deep and my sister and me had to pitch our tent and get some wood, but there were plenty of dry willows. After we had made mother as comfortable as possible, we went to find father, but the wind was blowing the snow so hard we could not see anything…. We did not find father that night.</span></span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> </span></span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">“ The next morning the snow was about eighteen inches deep and awful cold. While my sister was preparing our little bite of breakfast I went to look for father, and found him under the wagon with snow all over him and he was stiff and dead. I felt as though my heart would burst as I sat down beside him in the snow and took his hand in mine and cried, “Oh, Father, Father.”</span></span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> </span></span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">“ There we were, away from everything, away out on the plains with hardly anything to eat or wear, and father dead and mother sick; a widow with five children and hardly able to live from day to day. After I had my cry out I went back to the tent and told mother and the children. To try to write my feelings is out of the question.</span></span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> </span></span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">“ We were not the only family called upon to mourn the loss of a father that morning, for there were thirteen men dead in camp.</span></span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> </span></span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">“ The men that were able to do anything cleared off the snow and made a fire and thawed the ground and dug a hole and buried all in one grave. I can assure you that the men had no heart to do more, than they had to do.”</span></span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> </span></span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> (Source: Memoirs of Heber McBride, October 1856)</span></span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">Darvil B. McBride, Newport Beach, California</span></span>Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-33082022358640497292012-01-17T22:33:00.000-08:002012-01-17T22:33:11.179-08:00Jesus love is like a river....I have been searching in my heart these past few months. Searching for what I truly want. I have found that there is so much for me to experience and so much for me to learn. I was searching my scriptures one day a few months a go and came across my favorite scripture. <br />
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"And Ruth said Intreat me not to leave thee, or to return from following thee. For where thou goest I will go, where thou lodgest I will lodge. Thy people shall be my people,and thy God, my God". ~Ruth 1:16~ <br />
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This scripture has had so much meaning for me. It is true genuine love. Pure honest true love. It is what I feel for Jesus Christ and what he has done for me. He gave up his life for me. For my son. For my hubby. It is so genuine and so powerful. As a mother to know that someone has that much love for me, for my son and my hubby and my entire family. I feel tingly and joyful. Astonished and humbled by this most courageous act. <br />
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I was going through some of Janice Kapp Perry's music that I have on my iPad and found one of my favorite songs. Jesus love is like a river. The soft gentle words. The humbling story it tells. I find myself entranced into a cloud of humility and grace. Peace and love. Janice has a way of writing music that speaks straight to the soul. Another of my ultimate favorites is God bless our homes and families. It makes me feel so grateful that I have my mother who showed me true love and showed me how to be a good mother. As I watch my son grow I can't help but feel a little understanding towards how a mother helps shape and guide her family spiritually. Most of the time I don't feel as though I measure up to what the lord expects of me but I always known that with forgiveness and repentance I can become who I was meant to be.Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-43393151069981869302011-07-14T11:23:00.000-07:002011-08-15T21:33:14.540-07:00Birthday Boy!!I know it has been a long time since I posted anything about life, Michael or me. Time seems to have flown away on me.<br />
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Last month on July 15, Michael turned 1! To say that much has changed in a year is putting it lightly. Michael was the best thing to ever happen to me. He is my light, my life, and all that I live for. His smiling face makes everything seem brighter. I can't help but pray that he will forever be my little prince charming, but I know that will not be. He will grow up someday but for now he is my little Prince. He saved my life and he changed me into who I am.<br />
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For his birthday we went to Henderson Swimming Pool with his Grandparents. I personally hate parties and it causes me to much stress to think about hosting one. We went swimming and then went to our house for food and cake! Michael was such a great sport and he had so much fun at the pool. He loves water.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Michael got a taste of KitKat bars at the pool. I think he liked it!</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Munchin on some grub and wrapped in his housecoat after the swimming. </td></tr>
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He got to play with his cousins, Landon and Naomi, since my mom was babysitting them that weekend. Michael goes to their house all the time when I am at work and his Aunt Heather takes care of him. He has made some playmates in the process.<br />
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Michael has grown up so much and his sense of humor is awesome! He makes me laugh all the time and he is getting smarter by the day. When I ask him to do something, he does it. When I am doing the laundry, he very politely unfolds everything for me so that I have to do it again. It has become an ongoing game of ours and he finds it the best game ever. He also loves to open the shower door while you are taking a shower and then will stand there and play in the water at your feet. Makes for a breezy hot shower and a fast one as well.<br />
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</div>Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-23450652647465039182011-07-14T09:53:00.000-07:002011-07-14T09:53:44.400-07:00Family Vacation...Fort Steele British ColumbiaEvery year Frankie and I have gone on camping trips to BC. We have been to Kimberley and Fairmont. This year we wanted to go someplace different. We went to historical Fort Steele. It was so much fun. We have a tent trailer now and it makes camping with Michael an easy fun experience. He loved the trailer and was bouncing around, jumping and laughing at everyone and everything. We went swimming at the campgrounds pool and he loved that. We even went to Moyie Lake and played in the sand and the water. It was so much fun. Michael thought that the sand was really funny. He kept picking it up and letting it slip between his fingers onto his legs. It was adorable. He was following Frankie into the water as well. He thought it was fun. Sadly I forgot to take my camera to Moyie Lake with us so I have no pictures of all the fun we had there.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Some of the beautiful scenery from our camp.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Michael riding on an old pioneer rocking horse. </td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Frankie was teaching Michael how to throw a rock into the river. </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Michael chilling in the hammock we have for camping. </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Family photo OPP!!</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Mommy and Michael in the garden of an old settler house. </td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Waiting for the Steam Train to arrive</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I CAN HEAR THE TRAINS HORN!!</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjL9qRBdAabM4W7Ds_CDB7wKGDpxw11DjYwTFTPoMjxi1ik3m2OhekRH8A_YnTSmRQDJ5Gpj8-8ZxOtgpQndq3NztUFsBw4HlwnCT6ltasWdiBHTuzzWjHQdDGSwft-HlHxgINmIPy9Ups/s1600/DSC01178.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjL9qRBdAabM4W7Ds_CDB7wKGDpxw11DjYwTFTPoMjxi1ik3m2OhekRH8A_YnTSmRQDJ5Gpj8-8ZxOtgpQndq3NztUFsBw4HlwnCT6ltasWdiBHTuzzWjHQdDGSwft-HlHxgINmIPy9Ups/s320/DSC01178.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The place we stayed. </td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqoMEn24pXh7aHaBiRqdYq3Q_dyNVpL4GtnWiHoBcw8V1_QgsMCn_1eLymU3B5Uj2puSe4z0SMFWRykX8E4moquknU7oLTHoxfbQa_DhZ8lXnjaYlyipd2SVwPQHXXT6VK_khoGTcms2w/s1600/DSC01390.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqoMEn24pXh7aHaBiRqdYq3Q_dyNVpL4GtnWiHoBcw8V1_QgsMCn_1eLymU3B5Uj2puSe4z0SMFWRykX8E4moquknU7oLTHoxfbQa_DhZ8lXnjaYlyipd2SVwPQHXXT6VK_khoGTcms2w/s320/DSC01390.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">On the train. </td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjclb-76lDmRcw5gok8EtdUesDksVd-WM6H8k2G0_UbqTapun4dwwwlWJ0wqHsEWqRkGoADUDf0rYgbHToXuiQdQOtm9Ep_7kPKU2CAviysK9xQzsvr3mbkTNLFTGA4Qp9gm855NF1whg/s1600/DSC01391.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjclb-76lDmRcw5gok8EtdUesDksVd-WM6H8k2G0_UbqTapun4dwwwlWJ0wqHsEWqRkGoADUDf0rYgbHToXuiQdQOtm9Ep_7kPKU2CAviysK9xQzsvr3mbkTNLFTGA4Qp9gm855NF1whg/s320/DSC01391.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Enjoying the train ride. </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
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</tbody></table>Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-632878989865615612011-06-26T22:46:00.000-07:002011-06-26T22:46:24.407-07:00Beautiful Mountains,In Alberta we suffer the harsh weather all year. It may be summer but almost everybody carries a sweater with them just in case that wind starts up or maybe it starts to rain, or even crazier, snow!<br />
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Summer is a time that I truly enjoy. Not only is my little family celebrated every month of summer, but we go camping in British Columbia every July. Camping is our favorite thing. We get away from the hustle and bustle, work, drama, and also electronics. We rely on fire and eachother. I love nature and the beauty it has. Being up in the Canadian Rockies is like a piece of heaven. I can see how God truly loved us. He gave us this most amazing place to live. I feel sorry for all the people in the world who say that miracles don't exist. If only they spent a few days in the mountains.<br />
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In the bible, Moses went up into the Mountains to speak with the Lord. Noah went into the mountains as well. The bible says that God dwells in holy places, and for me the mountains truly are the most holy beautiful places on this earth. Temples are glorious, beautiful, peaceful and radiant. But the mountains are truly miraculous. They offer peace of mind, fear, humility, education, nature, birth, death, and so much more. Everything I value is with me when I go to the mountains. Just me, my family, nature, and God! <br />
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Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-51860933342285548952011-06-22T21:05:00.000-07:002011-06-22T21:05:16.824-07:00Time is moving on...and I am stuck still?As time has passed I have been trying my hardest to overcome the hardest experience of my life. Now I must admit I was wallowing in my own guilt and pity for a long time. I played the victim and acted like it was everybody around me that was responsible for my pain. But in truth, my pain was all from me. I caused it. I continued it for months and I hurt many other people around me. People that I love and who I care about deeply. But now it is going to stop. Nobody can tell me what I am to do anymore. I will not allow myself to be that victim even if I was the one victimizing myself.<br />
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I have goals, I have a job that I love! I love who I work with and the cause that I work in favor of. I love my family. I love my boyfriend/ Husband (I call Frank my husband since we have been living together so long and have a son.) I love Michael and how he inspires me to be what he deserves. I love his laugh, his smile, his baby talk and I even love his little baby snore.<br />
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At times it feels like everyone is moving on so fast in life and I am watching them all move on and be excited about the changes. I have felt like I am moving in s-l-o-w m-o-t-i-o-n. But now I am starting to see my life in a new light. I have so much. I have Frankie who is the most hardworking generous guy I know. I have Michael who is so loving, so cute, and so much a part of me. They make my life worth living. They make my life brighter and happier every single day. They are my light, my life, and my song.Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-75448002706195572292011-06-10T13:07:00.000-07:002011-06-10T13:07:47.350-07:00What if Cats Had Thumbs?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/h6CcxJQq1x8?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-66924411404245240632011-06-10T13:02:00.000-07:002011-06-10T13:02:01.341-07:00Reflections...How Time Changes Us.So the time has come. On Monday morning I shall be back behind my desk at Canadian Blood Services. I find it hard to get my mind around the fact that 12 months have passed. This past year has been the most difficult, most amazing, heartfelt, troublesome, and tiring time of my life. I find it amazing to look back and see just how different my life truly has become. I used to be just Ashley. Now I am Ashley, mother to Michael. I have been living with Frank for almost a year. My son is going to be 11 months in a few short days. And I am completely happy. I love what my life is becoming. I love who I am becoming as well. I am finding joy in simpler things, like gardening. I love watching my son play and learn. He loves to sit on my lap as I read him my favorite stories from when I was a little girl. Last night I read The Berenstain Bears. I just love those books. <br />
But I am very excited to be heading back to work. I miss the ladies there. Karen, Charlotte, SHERIE, Jen, Sheena, Cindy, Belinda, Lindsey, ect. I miss the conversations. I miss the donors who come through regularly. I miss the gossip as well. I love being able to say that I work with the best women around. They are funny, smart, kind, generous, patient, and understanding. I love listening to their stories and what they find interesting. The vacations that they all take.<br />
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I am going to miss those special moments that I will miss with Michael, but I have the rest of my life to have more special moments and to make memories with him. He needs to socialize. To learn to play with other kids. I do feel like I have been a failure in that aspect of his life. He has been so secluded and lonely with just me that when he is around children he stares like "what are they?"<br />
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I am so Thankful for Frank. He is a tremendous father and a great supporter. I love him and all he does for our family. He talks more about our future now. Marriage, another baby, buying a nice house with a large yard and a garage. We have been getting much closer and have been more tolerant of the others short comings. He has been a great supporter of my going back to work and has also been a great help to me when I am having bad days.<br />
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The past month has been fabulous. I decided to go visit my doc about 5 weeks ago to be put on anti- depressants. I must say that I use to be paranoid, angry, frustrated, full of anxiety, and never happy. I never wanted anyone to be happy or to hear about the good things in life. I wanted everything to be miserable, I wanted everyone to be miserable with me. And I was starting to be very successful with it. But then as I looked at myself and what my life was becoming, I realized that my life was terrible because I was making it that way. And although I finally saw that, I still had no idea why I was thinking that way or how to make it stop. I used to have nights where my mind would race and race and I couldn't fall asleep. I would stress about tiny little things and cry over stupid little nothings. I thought the whole world hated me, that everyone was against me. Then I visited my doctor. He made me try one drug for a week to see if the side affects bothered me and boy did they ever. I was neasous, I could hardly eat, and everynight I felt like puking. I lost weight which was nice but I would rather be fat then feel like that. Then he put me on ZOLOFT, and I must say, it is now my favorite thing ever. I have zero negative side affects. I have been feeling amazing. I never knew how miserable I truly was till I started feeling happy. And the happy just keeps getting better and better. I have only had 1 bad day in over a month. As opposed to 3 good days in a month and the rest were terrible. I am loving life.<br />
<br />
So for now I am keeping my chin up, and facing the road ahead with my son in my arms and Frankie by my side. I am ready for the life ahead. "Hit me with your best shot." So to the world I say, GIVE IT ALL YOU GOT BABY!Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-80939650394037627042011-06-02T21:18:00.000-07:002011-06-02T21:18:03.854-07:00Deserving and Worthiness...for Happiness I got this from OPRAH's final episode. It is the truth. It is the light. It is inspiration.<br />
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<br />
<blockquote><i>"I learned from the guests on this show, no need to feel superior to anybody. Because whether it's heroin addiction or gambling addiction or shopping addiction or food addiction, work addiction, the root is all the same. The show has taught me there is a common thread that runs through all of our pain and all of our suffering, and that is unworthiness. Not feeling worthy enough to own the life you were created for. Even people who believe they deserve to be happy and have nice things often don't feel worthy once they have them.<br />
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"There is a difference, you know, between thinking you deserve to be happy and knowing you are worthy of happiness." </i></blockquote>Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-31068799168886729272011-06-02T21:00:00.000-07:002011-06-02T21:00:57.045-07:00My Happiness Plan. As many women my age, I grew up with a mother who loved Oprah. So I learned many things by watching with my mother. She inspired me and I eventually started watching her on my own. Her last episode made me cry. She inspired me with her wisdom. I felt like she was talking to me.<br />
<br />
"We all believe we deserve to be happy. But not many of us think we are worthy of happiness. There is a difference. You ARE worthy of happiness. "<br />
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When she said those words I felt tingles down my spine. I felt like she was speaking to me. This past year has been incredibly difficult for me. Many ups and downs. Many nights of staying awake for all hours wondering "What if?" I wondered onto Oprah's website the other night and found the article "Your Happiness Plan" 10 Ways to be Happier NOW! I am going to challenge myself. I am going to apply all the things mentioned in this into my own life.<br />
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Step One begins today.<br />
<br />
5 Things Happy People Do.<br />
<ol><li>They find their most Golden Self. </li>
<li>They Design their lives to bring in Joy. </li>
<li>They avoid "IF ONLY" fantasies. </li>
<li>They put best friends first. </li>
<li>They allow themselves to be Happy. (You are worthy of Happiness.)</li>
</ol>Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-13986005625290740102011-05-30T11:12:00.000-07:002011-05-30T11:12:32.391-07:00The Written Word is a Sacred and Powerful Thing.When I was little my mother used to beg me to read. I would eventually pick up a book and start to read it but I never finished a book before getting rid of it. I thought that reading was boring and that it was for complete losers. It was for people who had zero imagination. That was until I was 13.<br />
When we moved to small town, nothing to do Magrath, Alberta. I didn't like the people, I didn't like the snobby non welcoming way the people ignored a new comer. I seriously hated the school and the teachers. I hated that the students were snobby and didn't like people that were different. It was like everyone had to fit into three different kinds of molds or else they were not welcome and were treated with disrespect. I used to wander the halls at lunch period and waste time. And it being such a small school with nothing to do, I found myself wandering into the library often. I would read the magazines in there or do word searches. Finally I thought to look at the books and read one.<br />
Now I can't remember the title of the book. But I remember the main character was named Gwen and she was a princess of a world that was beneath the fountain in Central Park. She escaped through the fountain and found herself in the normal human world. But she was also magical. She aged much slower. She met a man who also had escaped from the fountain and was now raising his great great great great grandchildren. They didn't know he was from another world, that he was magical and aged much slower then humans. Gwen explored the world, and learned many things, but also learned that when somebody discovered her secret they would go to great lengths to get control over her. So eventually she escaped back into her world, she left behind a friend and a boyfriend. She would often look back up through the fountain and see him looking down into it.<br />
Now I was 13 when I read this and it peaked my interest. For the first time I had seen that reading gave me the opportunity to imagine things. To have dreams about something other then reality. Looking back the story line sounds retarted and weak but at the time, it gave me a different reality then the one I was living. I started reading all the time. I spent hours reading at home. I would read at lunch and during my free time at school. I read over 30 books in grade 8. It was opening my eyes to a new life. Over the next two years I discovered that I had particular taste in books. I liked reality and romance. Not the sexy steamy romance novels that are meant to create arousal but the story lines where someone would truly love someone. Like a mothers love for her daughter, a boyfriends genuine love for his girlfriend. A father daughter story. I also noticed that I loved reading particular writiers. Anita Stansfield, Nora Roberts, Charlotte Bronte, Emily Bronte, Anne Bronte, James Clavell, Steinbeck, Jane Austen, John Grisham, Philippa Gregory, ect...<br />
Now after all I have read, I have a new found love of books. The written word is not only a way for someone to escape into a fictional world, but it also gives a single person the ability to write their truth. They can tell their story. If it is about abuse, drugs, sex, work, school, parties, birthdays, being a parent, or just rambling on for the sake of it. The ability to express yourself to the world and connect with people on a personal level is strong and powerful. It gives those who feel invisible and like they have no purpose, a voice to say I AM HERE!<br />
So I treat all my books with respect and I make sure that they are organized and put away when I am not reading them. I love the written word and the ability it has to show me how much I have learned and how much I have grown.<br />
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<blockquote><blockquote><span style="color: #c80000; font-family: Times New Roman, Arial; font-size: 9pt; font-weight: bold;">“</span>He that loves a book will never want a faithful friend, a wholesome counselor, a cheerful companion, an effectual comforter. By study, by reading, by thinking, one may innocently divert and pleasantly entertain himself, as in all weathers, as in all fortunes.<span style="color: #c80000; font-family: Times New Roman, Arial; font-size: 9pt; font-weight: bold;">”</span><br />
<img alt="" height="1" src="http://www.readfaster.com/images/pixel.gif" width="20" /><sup><span style="color: #c80000;"> - Barrow</span></sup></blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><span style="color: #c80000; font-family: Times New Roman, Arial; font-size: 9pt; font-weight: bold;">“</span>To read is to fly: it is to soar to a point of vantage which gives a view over wide terrains of history, human variety, ideas, shared experience and the fruits of many inquiries.<span style="color: #c80000; font-family: Times New Roman, Arial; font-size: 9pt; font-weight: bold;">”</span><br />
<img alt="" height="1" src="http://www.readfaster.com/images/pixel.gif" width="20" /><sup><span style="color: #c80000;"> - A C Grayling, Financial Times (in a review of A History of Reading by Alberto Manguel)</span></sup></blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><span style="color: #c80000; font-family: Times New Roman, Arial; font-size: 9pt; font-weight: bold;">“</span>A book is the only place in which you can examine a fragile thought without breaking it, or explore an explosive idea without fear it will go off in your face. It is one of the few havens remaining where a man's mind can get both provocation and privacy.<span style="color: #c80000; font-family: Times New Roman, Arial; font-size: 9pt; font-weight: bold;">”</span><br />
<img alt="" height="1" src="http://www.readfaster.com/images/pixel.gif" width="20" /><sup><span style="color: #c80000;"> - Edward P. Morgan</span></sup></blockquote></blockquote>Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-74435838239770541322011-05-23T14:06:00.000-07:002011-05-23T14:06:52.470-07:00To Oprah! This is for OPRAH! The woman who liberated women all over the world. Gave them a voice and proved that a woman is a very powerful thing to be. She encouraged children, women, and men who have endured abuse, to speak out and share their story. She has millions of dollars and she gives so much of it back to the people who need it most. She had a troubled childhood, a shaky beginning in her career and she showed that no matter what the odds, you can be somebody and you can do something that will impact those around you.<br />
From Dave Pelzer to Clayton Moss, she covered the most horrific cases of child abuse. She reunited families together after years of separation. She honored soldiers and their families. She educated girls who had no place to go and would in no other way have an education. She used her popularity and her money to put many pedophiles behind bars. She encouraged people to read and to give back to those around you.<br />
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Oprah's Big Give forever touched my heart and changed the lives of thousands of people.<br />
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I respect Oprah and what she has done for the world. She opened my eyes to many many things. She shared Dr. Oz with us. Who has taught me so much about health (mental and physical) and has encouraged me to take better care of myself. She gave us Dr. Phil who has great sayings such as "How's that workin for ya?" or "The way to predict future behavior is by past behavior." She has opened up her heart to the world and in many ways she has saved my life.<br />
Oprah helped me with my parents divorce and when I was feeling alone. She taught me that no matter who it is, there is no right for someone to abuse another. She taught me that I need to dream. Dream big, dream small. Whatever it is I need to have a dream.<br />
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So this one is for Oprah. Thank you for saving the lives of so many and teaching the world so much.Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-19282463735503445772011-05-15T21:18:00.000-07:002011-05-15T21:18:33.782-07:00Life as Mommy...with Postpartum Depression. When Michael was born I was so sure that I was not going to be one of those people that would get Postpartum Depression (PPD) but soon enough the symptoms were clear as day. I became so embarrassed about it that I tried to hide it. Finally when I went to visit my mother she sat me down and said that she knew something was wrong. I started to bawl immediately and she just put her arm on my shoulders and let me cry. She talked to me about how I felt. And to be honest, I didn't know how I felt. I didn't like myself, what I had done, why I had done it and I just wanted things to end and for me to disappear. When we spoke about this I felt like for the first time in a LONG time somebody knew what I was saying. Frankie and I were struggling with out relationship, the adoption choice, and being new parents. Adding depression on top of that was incredibly difficult. He didn't know how I felt and what to do. I felt like I was a prisoner in my own body and I had a baby to take care of. As much as I love Michael, all I wanted was for him to sleep all day and not need me so much. I felt like I was unable to take care of myself so how on earth could I take care of a helpless baby?<br />
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When Michael was 9 months old, I said to myself, I need to get some help. I had been trying to ignore this problem for so long and my mental health was sliding down the drain. How was I to go back to work, be a mother and not fall apart? I went to my doctor in Raymond, Dr. Terry Smith. He has been my doctor for years and he knows my mother had depression as well as other members of my family. He listened to me and immediately put me on something. It feels good to know that finally I am on the path to recovery.<br />
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At first my bad days were only once in a while, then they were more frequent. Then all of a sudden they were lasting 2 -3 days at a time and I was so incredibly angry that I actually threw something at Frank. I physically wanted to hurt him to make him feel how I felt. To feel the frustration and the anger, but mostly the pain, that I was living with every single day. Now my days are better, my moments are no longer days. I have a few bad hours here and there but mostly all I feel is improvement.Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-29620272135951956142011-05-10T18:49:00.000-07:002011-05-10T18:49:24.204-07:00Fun in the Sun. Well we finally got some nice heat here in Lethbridge. I have been looking at baby pools for about three weeks already and wanted to buy the perfect one for Michael. Something that he could grow in but that wasn't going to be to big for him right now. So today I went and bought him his first baby pool and we put it outside right away. Michael loves water and as soon as he was in the pool he was splashing his little heart away. Daddy of course got in with him making it that much better.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjwKJOaZuw8q4kBArc-EmCmV5rCVioiBRld6t0HOb_opRggHg8yiZO1JRDqV_hAbu8tZLQ8FbwF_gCyE9ulUHNYpYXJ4uWZfErDefkmQXGXTRfI_l1wOPz_4hc1VHABOTauHty1u1rkzbo/s1600/DSC01072.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjwKJOaZuw8q4kBArc-EmCmV5rCVioiBRld6t0HOb_opRggHg8yiZO1JRDqV_hAbu8tZLQ8FbwF_gCyE9ulUHNYpYXJ4uWZfErDefkmQXGXTRfI_l1wOPz_4hc1VHABOTauHty1u1rkzbo/s320/DSC01072.JPG" width="240" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwQk9YveO1Kw5s2ZHhYR4jEAac2NAeef8L_e2IvX98JHfLq3wib29DjH5ZAF27UB8RUNj0cZjlGb5b-qXbg-3CPZarmL5cDzxKE9IGy89RXV2QaVPpLcrhruEMdnEQSBt4i_ADToTA13Q/s1600/DSC01018.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwQk9YveO1Kw5s2ZHhYR4jEAac2NAeef8L_e2IvX98JHfLq3wib29DjH5ZAF27UB8RUNj0cZjlGb5b-qXbg-3CPZarmL5cDzxKE9IGy89RXV2QaVPpLcrhruEMdnEQSBt4i_ADToTA13Q/s320/DSC01018.JPG" width="240" /></a></div><blockquote> He started splashing so hard that it would hit him in the face. He thought it was funny and kept doing it. Such a funny boy. </blockquote><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7abak6L7xJe_PbIrsZ6AfyjqCkW16R0spvAMtSEQ7XBTV-p7uxvA4ouzjLZvJRzWn0QIepVCgbNkN5Z9Uw89mjrpOFzSFnCUPY4-ka8CDqeoDcMZIJ4uFLj1UQXKlLhwz3o7cmS0hBNk/s1600/DSC01021.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7abak6L7xJe_PbIrsZ6AfyjqCkW16R0spvAMtSEQ7XBTV-p7uxvA4ouzjLZvJRzWn0QIepVCgbNkN5Z9Uw89mjrpOFzSFnCUPY4-ka8CDqeoDcMZIJ4uFLj1UQXKlLhwz3o7cmS0hBNk/s320/DSC01021.JPG" width="240" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFpn1fb1MJxvp7YwJ7HDupBwMV6DQzUL6EbYL9APfIcD9ZPefcxhyJLqnnUXlgBiY4cYjDtafXadTu73_PswNUJgtY7_8mcIS34MTOLwtYQ5_p8aH_90OUfjawS91VXuwx8mJvJnVqNCs/s1600/DSC01026.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFpn1fb1MJxvp7YwJ7HDupBwMV6DQzUL6EbYL9APfIcD9ZPefcxhyJLqnnUXlgBiY4cYjDtafXadTu73_PswNUJgtY7_8mcIS34MTOLwtYQ5_p8aH_90OUfjawS91VXuwx8mJvJnVqNCs/s320/DSC01026.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><blockquote> He got right down on his belly and was splashing and trying to drink from a bottle that he plays with in water. He actually squeezes the bottle and sips from the top. He figured that out on his own. </blockquote><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1hMLNXNCC6vETLu64iAWUypk9Ejc04hv_ivnnbv5oM7cpdLeil7AeQfos87vSVcFfwexMJ0Q0wgIRVDbQwwcxhu4hYaangf4LRw2FBtBjg3xAbvGdX0T9gAVGHth-KWk3AGX8sjRDo3I/s1600/DSC01034.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1hMLNXNCC6vETLu64iAWUypk9Ejc04hv_ivnnbv5oM7cpdLeil7AeQfos87vSVcFfwexMJ0Q0wgIRVDbQwwcxhu4hYaangf4LRw2FBtBjg3xAbvGdX0T9gAVGHth-KWk3AGX8sjRDo3I/s320/DSC01034.JPG" width="240" /></a></div><blockquote> Got to love having a booger sucker in the water. Anything that squirts water is the best fun. </blockquote><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh87S498Kds3bhs3vBmjGpKSQ3cmq9v9XSZZY6euBezGJRR8hEuPfGLZCO9rut4POlJ_KooS_c5AEYuj91JONxtFGNyTEE_niXXKTAH2JUWippb4D1JYnEUDmTLQVd0w-aDrmedonmjg5Q/s1600/DSC01054.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh87S498Kds3bhs3vBmjGpKSQ3cmq9v9XSZZY6euBezGJRR8hEuPfGLZCO9rut4POlJ_KooS_c5AEYuj91JONxtFGNyTEE_niXXKTAH2JUWippb4D1JYnEUDmTLQVd0w-aDrmedonmjg5Q/s320/DSC01054.JPG" width="240" /></a></div><blockquote> Michael learned how to drink from a straw a couple days ago and thinks he is the cats meow now. He gets to slurp some of mommy or daddy's slurpee and drink from my water bottle so I bought him his own. </blockquote><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijqvB9vWHmnKOVRqvnFWla6kW-BrTQBTdkYJL5R3fn6S3apSZ9glJydmt5rZZX-DJHthhVjjqOVioqBwMoLf1zDXMPHwB08DNLqwH_7Z-3TqXVvW1RC3_CfVSF8sMdDIZcNss1VlJWTE4/s1600/DSC01089.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijqvB9vWHmnKOVRqvnFWla6kW-BrTQBTdkYJL5R3fn6S3apSZ9glJydmt5rZZX-DJHthhVjjqOVioqBwMoLf1zDXMPHwB08DNLqwH_7Z-3TqXVvW1RC3_CfVSF8sMdDIZcNss1VlJWTE4/s320/DSC01089.JPG" width="240" /></a></div><blockquote>At the end he was all smiles for mommy, especially when Daddy is holding him. Such a big smile. I love this little man so much. </blockquote>Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-45137774513692834992011-05-08T10:36:00.000-07:002011-05-08T10:38:46.554-07:00TO the Loves of my Life...Frankie and Michael.I am blessed to have two very special men in my life. Frankie and Michael.<br />
Frankie is a very hardworking, amazing father, and funny dorkishly cute man.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Kimberley BC July 5 2009</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_iWaPfxM_C7BjUPKS7lgNMssaYcA7oWjCRsTSO_qKnrSr9cuqwuWzFZxsYsNkVfUam1HJUzOWZBCxu-doJhT5eT22ALRlZfAg-H3BS2qFjaIaL5ng1SvHMVt2BJQbwJLI-C7KOpL6Tt0/s1600/Ashley+266.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_iWaPfxM_C7BjUPKS7lgNMssaYcA7oWjCRsTSO_qKnrSr9cuqwuWzFZxsYsNkVfUam1HJUzOWZBCxu-doJhT5eT22ALRlZfAg-H3BS2qFjaIaL5ng1SvHMVt2BJQbwJLI-C7KOpL6Tt0/s320/Ashley+266.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Kimberley BC- Mine Railway Train Ride July 3 2009</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
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</tbody></table>We go camping together and have a blast in BC every summer. We love the mountains, and the fresh air. I love the animals that you can hear wondering around at night. Frankie loves to cook over the fire and when we camp we eat better then we do at home. <br />
The first camping trip we went on was to Kimberley BC. I went there when I was 8 and I had a blast. So I convinced Frankie to go there and we had so much fun. The weather was beautiful, and we stayed at a really fun and really nice camp ground. <a href="http://www.kimberleycampground.com/">Kimberley Riverside Campground</a>. We went to the townsite and walked around and I made Frank go on the Underground Railway train ride with me. They take you up to the old mine, and they give you a tour of it. It is deep inside the mountain.Frankie and I love movies, and we look forward to the warm sun that comes every summer so that we can escape to British Columbia. This year I want to go to Golden BC and to Radium Hot Springs.<br />
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Michael is a funny little boy with spunk. He is a flirt and is extremely shy. He loves his daddy and can already say Dadda and he says it ALL THE TIME! I am trying to teach him Momma but so far all I get is mmmm. He was born 6lbs 10oz and he has grown up so much. <table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKUK0S7iWSrRHsnGMYT7iUByPKJxPR3FeP4zAOntDIkZSqdwmvCuQqzOzCCCBsAiLAOH7R5cG5cQ264TquneSlR02pnFIFm3Bw9jYQ6scPDqC7jiAf4vEV0_GFUx20xskyMv0Y_wehNJU/s1600/DSCI2115.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKUK0S7iWSrRHsnGMYT7iUByPKJxPR3FeP4zAOntDIkZSqdwmvCuQqzOzCCCBsAiLAOH7R5cG5cQ264TquneSlR02pnFIFm3Bw9jYQ6scPDqC7jiAf4vEV0_GFUx20xskyMv0Y_wehNJU/s320/DSCI2115.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Michael July 15 2010 6 hours old. </td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhlhL-DAtvVuB7MrtMjXSd6SiclMz06SE-4-_5QXI9liiNEtFuCLDpShCo8-qU-F9Cfh_q6hChYempKiT1z7Wx8PpHMt3LJuELe-MdgHnaYCt7Y0elcFzuy9OuSLgZbMOJa1_0ciWa3nGM/s1600/DSC00483.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhlhL-DAtvVuB7MrtMjXSd6SiclMz06SE-4-_5QXI9liiNEtFuCLDpShCo8-qU-F9Cfh_q6hChYempKiT1z7Wx8PpHMt3LJuELe-MdgHnaYCt7Y0elcFzuy9OuSLgZbMOJa1_0ciWa3nGM/s320/DSC00483.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Michael February 2011. </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
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I found a song three years ago when Frankie and I met and ever since then it has been my theme song about him.Westlife's I Wanna Grow Old With You. <br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><object class="BLOGGER-youtube-video" classid="clsid:D27CDB6E-AE6D-11cf-96B8-444553540000" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0" data-thumbnail-src="http://3.gvt0.com/vi/_GvhHN2p1EM/0.jpg" height="266" width="320"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/_GvhHN2p1EM&fs=1&source=uds" /><param name="bgcolor" value="#FFFFFF" /><embed width="320" height="266" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/_GvhHN2p1EM&fs=1&source=uds" type="application/x-shockwave-flash"></embed></object></div><blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><i>Another day </i><br />
<i>Without your smile </i><br />
<i>Another day just passes by </i><br />
<i>But now I know </i><br />
<i>How much it means </i><br />
<i>For you to stay </i><br />
<i>Right here with me </i><br />
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<i>The time we spent apart will make our love grow stronger </i><br />
<i>But it hurt so bad I can't take it any longer </i><br />
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<i>I wanna grow old with you </i><br />
<i>I wanna die lying in your arms </i><br />
<i>I wanna grow old with you </i><br />
<i>I wanna be looking in your eyes </i><br />
<i>I wanna be there for you </i><br />
<i>Sharing everything you do </i><br />
<i>I wanna grow old with you </i><br />
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<i>A thousand miles between us now </i><br />
<i>It causes me to wonder how </i><br />
<i>Our love tonight remains so strong </i><br />
<i>It makes our risk right all along </i><br />
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<i>The time we spent apart will make our love grow stronger </i><br />
<i>But it hurt so bad I can't take it any longer </i><br />
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<i>I wanna grow old with you </i><br />
<i>I wanna die lying in your arms </i><br />
<i>I wanna grow old with you </i><br />
<i>I wanna be looking in your eyes </i><br />
<i>I wanna be there for you </i><br />
<i>Sharing everything you do </i><br />
<i>I wanna grow old with you </i><br />
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<i>Things can come and go I know but </i><br />
<i>Baby I believe </i><br />
<i>Something's burning strong between us </i><br />
<i>Makes it clear to me </i><br />
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<i>I wanna grow old with you </i><br />
<i>I wanna die lying in your arms </i><br />
<i>I wanna grow old with you </i><br />
<i>I wanna be looking in your eyes </i><br />
<i>I wanna be there for you </i><br />
<i>Sharing everything you do </i><br />
<i>I wanna grow old with you </i><br />
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</i></blockquote></blockquote>Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-59117477968358090062011-05-08T10:06:00.000-07:002011-05-08T10:06:56.775-07:00Escape to Freedom I love being a mommy. I love being Michael's mother more then anything. I have been so blessed in so many ways. Yet still I found myself sinking into a deep hole. Depression runs in my family and I have always battled it, but after Michael was born I started sinking at an incredible rate. Some days I would cry for no reason, others I was so angry at everything that happened or was said. Nothing could soothe my frustration or anxiety. I put on a face for others so that they wouldn't see it but inside I was screaming. <br />
I spoke to my mother about this, since she suffered with depression for 25 years. She is better now and has learned how to handle her life in a way that she doesn't cause stress or anxiety. It felt like she could read my inner thoughts and she knew exactly what I was feeling. I felt like I was an open book to her, but to everyone else they just saw a cover. She spoke to me about ways to handle it and ways to help prevent the high anxiety that I was always feeling. Turns out I am my own worst enemy.<br />
I went to my doctor, after 9 months of avoiding him. I said I needed Happy Pills. He has known me since I was 12 and he is the doctor for 7 of my family members. He put me on a medication trial for 7 days. And so far I am hating this drug. It makes me very sickly feeling. Not enjoying it at all. So for the next few months I am guessing, I will be testing out different anti- depressants to see how they affect me and make me feel.Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-45080427930847663312011-05-06T12:08:00.000-07:002011-05-06T12:08:32.967-07:00Birth Mothers Appreciation I am super duper excited about Birth Mothers Appreciation. Me and two others have started working on putting together a group for girls who need support. It is not just for those who are placing for adoption, but for those who had a surprise pregnancy. Whether you keep your little one, or you place them for adoption, this is the place to read about others who have the same feelings and experiences that they had.<br />
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<a href="http://birthmothersappreciation.blogspot.com/">birthmothersappreciation.blogspot.com</a> Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-13860609413053953312011-05-06T11:30:00.000-07:002011-05-06T11:33:09.535-07:00HAPPY BIRTHMOTHERS DAY!!!!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/xzp10YpwtIc?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div><br />
Marie Osmond does the best job showing the emotion that this subject deserves.Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-14919550284139586652011-05-06T11:27:00.000-07:002011-05-06T11:27:11.928-07:00Mothers DayAs my first official Mothers Day is creeping closer, I can't help but look back on all that has happened. A year ago I sat in the bathroom, with the door locked, crying my eyes out. This year I laugh with my son as he plays in the house and says DADDA and glagaala sounds. <br />
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To all the mothers in the world, including Birth Mothers. HAPPY MOTHERS DAY! <br />
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Mothers Day always makes me think of one thing. "From Gods Arms, To My Arms, To Yours" Michael McLean wrote music about all sides of adoption. And since last year I was considering placing my baby for adoption it seems only right to reflect and remember. <br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-bXcKuGyLbEpA45pdWfbzbtKcdhgJkucbtKut3y9wd6DjTc3ttbT3FKxfkFrDBnJ5fm_w_WIaCqmZk5YYlIouunqLUSWDRA_UEXqDT0sNUBU1MoDzsPLf359PwGOITaw-IoXlCczOy5U/s1600/Birth+Mothers+Day.bmp" imageanchor="1" style="clear:right; float:right; margin-left:1em; margin-bottom:1em"><img border="0" height="240" width="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-bXcKuGyLbEpA45pdWfbzbtKcdhgJkucbtKut3y9wd6DjTc3ttbT3FKxfkFrDBnJ5fm_w_WIaCqmZk5YYlIouunqLUSWDRA_UEXqDT0sNUBU1MoDzsPLf359PwGOITaw-IoXlCczOy5U/s400/Birth+Mothers+Day.bmp" /></a></div>Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-89651854296871083942011-04-27T16:04:00.000-07:002011-04-27T16:05:47.363-07:00Let your light so shine...When I was 16 I was very active in my church. I went to the LDS church in Southern Alberta. My mom was the Laurels leader, which was my class in Young Womens. Every week, with every lesson she wanted to give us something inspiring to take home and help us remember the point to the lesson. Now at the time we both were in love with the movie "Coach Carter." The inspiration to be the best that you can was very touching to us both. The next lesson that we were scheduled to have was called "Letting your light shine..." <br />
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In the movie, near the end when Coach Carter comes to clean out his office after the school said that basketball was more important then good grades, there is a part that makes me cry. Timo Cruz was a troubled player. He lived a harsh life and everyday Coach Carter asked him "What are you afraid of boy?" The entire movie he pushes Coach Carter away and finally at the end, he knows what he is afraid of. <br />
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He quotes someone very special. Someone who suffered for years in prison. Nelson Mandela. <br />
<b><br />
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about<br />
shrinking so that other people wont feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. Its not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."<i></i></b><br />
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<br />
This quote truly has touched my life, and it meant a great deal when my mother <br />
handed the quote out in class. Reminding all the 16 and 17 year olds to not be afraid of who we truly are. Let your true self shine and no matter what others say, it will be the best thing. We need not fear others and what they say, for if we stand up for what we believe and think and who we are, then there would be no problem that we couldn't handle. <br />
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As a woman in 2011, it is truly hard to be true to yourself with all the pressure that there is. Makeup, working out, education, motherhood, friends, social activities, cooking... Everyday you are told that a real woman is this or that. How many of these woman are truly happy in their lives? <br />
<br />
I encourage everyone, and especially all the young woman, to be true to the real you. Stand up for who you are. Don't let someone walk over your beliefs and tell you what to do. If you don't want to do something then don't. It is as simple as that. Just say NO! <br />
<br />
Remember that out there is someone who will always appreciate the real you. They won't hate you for your mistakes, they will love you in spite of them.Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-10337101266477984052011-04-27T10:36:00.000-07:002011-04-27T10:36:03.281-07:00ROYAL WEDDING WEEK!!!I can't help but feel excited about Prince William and Kate Middleton getting married this week. I have set the PVR and am counting down to the wedding of the decade. I have watched the wedding of Charles to Diana Spencer many times and I can't help but hope that the royal family has learned some things since Diana. <br />
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We all have seen pictures of the famous Royal Wedding of Charles Prince of Wales to Lady Diana Spencer. Her dress with its incredibly long train and her glittering family Spencer tiara. Her youth is very clear as she was not yet the style icon she later on became. <br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-iVb0ex-6NYVu695Sfnrl1tUVFJQ_lz7eDUTXZVEw2DzlBFJPWNkOUh_R6E9v7JC3sM89t1NTAOAjxWHhDl3f0_NqfjqqmkgTOZ64cK5X_KmzIZRZdzCOdyo7YyKDBIGg5Bmd0lu2tqk/s1600/Diana+Spencer+Tiara.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear:left; float:left;margin-right:1em; margin-bottom:1em"><img border="0" height="320" width="290" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-iVb0ex-6NYVu695Sfnrl1tUVFJQ_lz7eDUTXZVEw2DzlBFJPWNkOUh_R6E9v7JC3sM89t1NTAOAjxWHhDl3f0_NqfjqqmkgTOZ64cK5X_KmzIZRZdzCOdyo7YyKDBIGg5Bmd0lu2tqk/s320/Diana+Spencer+Tiara.jpg" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6CIynAcAyBu-bDsxVN7fOh1ukNwxpqf2z572CddsnObD_-ekdDEn2U8L4TqmM1atQmGTDvB-_TTd9HZZLnIzMB7mswSX4uULgqZNdXcqLJbcw2l_hU1CFcWtHvUUh3tS-qqUZyJYCVWs/s1600/princess-diana-wedding-200.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear:right; float:right; margin-left:1em; margin-bottom:1em"><img border="0" height="230" width="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6CIynAcAyBu-bDsxVN7fOh1ukNwxpqf2z572CddsnObD_-ekdDEn2U8L4TqmM1atQmGTDvB-_TTd9HZZLnIzMB7mswSX4uULgqZNdXcqLJbcw2l_hU1CFcWtHvUUh3tS-qqUZyJYCVWs/s320/princess-diana-wedding-200.jpg" /></a></div><br />
I hope that the press and the country doesn't continue to link the similarities of Kate to Diana. They are so different from each other. Of course if you look at the pictures you can see some clothing items are very similar but the personalities of the two women are so different. Diana seemed to be drowning when she married Charles. She was not prepared for the life she would have to lead and she was not the typical woman that royalty wanted. She wasn't going to sit aside and let tradition dictate to her what she was allowed to do. She was open about her feelings and that she was going to do what she wanted to do. She broke years of tradition and fought for what she believed things should be. She had been raised in the Aristocratic world and in my opinion, was not a fan of tradition. She was screaming for a modern life, where she was allowed to do what she wanted, raise her children how she saw fit. She wanted a husband who loved her and wanted to give her all the happiness she deserved. Yet what she got was a man who only married her to get married and satisfy his family. <br />
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I cant even help but notice that the love William and Kate have is real. It is passionate and simple. Kate knows that she will have a big role and she is preparing to do so. She has never shown immaturity like Diana did at times. But then again she does have 10 years more experience then Diana did. <br />
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I wish them all the luck in the world.Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-23879572494762986612011-04-21T17:26:00.001-07:002011-04-21T17:26:58.401-07:00FIREWORK...!!!!I truly feel that this song is about everyone. We all have something to offer and we all need to let it shine. This year I make this song my theme. <br />
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Firework lyrics<br />
Songwriters: Dean, Esther; Eriksen, Mikkel; Hermansen, Tor Erik; Perry, Katy; Wilhelm, Sandy Julien;<br />
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Do you ever feel like a plastic bag<br />
Drifting through the wind, wanting to start again?<br />
Do you ever feel, feel so paper thin<br />
Like a house of cards, one blow from caving in?<br />
<br />
Do you ever feel already buried deep?<br />
Six feet under screams but no one seems to hear a thing<br />
Do you know that there's still a chance for you<br />
'Cause there's a spark in you?<br />
<br />
You just gotta ignite the light and let it shine<br />
Just own the night like the 4th of July<br />
<br />
'Cause baby, you're a firework<br />
Come on, show 'em what you're worth<br />
Make 'em go, oh<br />
As you shoot across the sky<br />
<br />
Baby, you're a firework<br />
Come on, let your colors burst<br />
Make 'em go, oh<br />
You're gonna leave 'em falling down<br />
<br />
You don't have to feel like a waste of space<br />
You're original, cannot be replaced<br />
If you only knew what the future holds<br />
After a hurricane comes a rainbow<br />
<br />
Maybe you're reason why all the doors are closed<br />
[ From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/k/katy-perry-lyrics/firework-lyrics.html ]<br />
So you could open one that leads you to the perfect road<br />
Like a lightning bolt, your heart will blow<br />
And when it's time, you'll know<br />
<br />
You just gotta ignite the light and let it shine<br />
Just own the night like the 4th of July<br />
<br />
'Cause baby you're a firework<br />
Come on, show 'em what you're worth<br />
Make 'em go, oh<br />
As you shoot across the sky<br />
<br />
Baby, you're a firework<br />
Come on, let your colors burst<br />
Make 'em go, oh<br />
You're gonna leave 'em falling down<br />
<br />
Boom, boom, boom<br />
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon<br />
It's always been inside of you, you, you<br />
And now it's time to let it through<br />
<br />
'Cause baby you're a firework<br />
Come on, show 'em what you're worth<br />
Make 'em go, oh<br />
As you shoot across the sky<br />
<br />
Baby, you're a firework<br />
Come on, let your colors burst<br />
Make 'em go, oh<br />
You're gonna leave 'em falling down<br />
<br />
Boom, boom, boom<br />
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon<br />
Boom, boom, boom<br />
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moonAshley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-39594463854222912382011-04-17T22:39:00.000-07:002011-04-18T09:12:54.193-07:00Birth Mothers AppreciationAs I was part of a birth mothers class, I know just how important the relationships that you make with those other girls truly are. It gives you the reassurance that you are not the only one who makes mistakes and that you are not in this alone. My pregnancy was incredibly difficult and if it wasn't for my mother, Frankie, and the class, I believe I would have really lost it. <br />
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I ran across a blog called Birth Mother Baskets the other day and it truly touched me. The appreciation and care that they are showing these girls is so deep and sincere. I wish it was available in Canada. <br />
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So since I was once in the BM shoes, I know just how hard it is. The emotional stress that you go through. Even though we kept Michael in the end, the stress of that choice was just as difficult. I had to hurt people who were so excited, their entire family was waiting for our son, yet we couldn't let him go. My family was very upset about it as well as they all felt like the adoptive family had lost a child. <br />
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I came up with an idea. An idea that I find perfect since it will not only be for the girls who place their children, but will be there for all the girls no matter what they do, except abortion. I contacted the other girls from my class, Dallas and Megan, and they have both agreed to help me out and they both seemed super excited. My family is going to be joining as well, as part of my family charity project. Project: Angels Keep. <br />
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What we will be doing it putting together things that will help with the adjustment process. We are gathering personal testimonials from girls who have placed for adoption, chosen single parenting, or they are raising the baby with the father. We will collect quotes, songs, books, journals, products for pampering, gift certificates, and for the mothers that are keeping we will give them gift certificates for places like Wal- Mart and Superstore and baby clothing stores to help with the cost of raising and feeding a child. Every basket will be filled with love and with things from people who have experienced these things before. We might even go in and talk to the girls and share our stories with them. <br />
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The project is called Birth Mothers Appreciation. Since every girl in the class will be giving birth, I consider them all Birth Mothers. No matter what, even if they keep or place for adoption. <br />
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If you wish to share your story, or you have quotes or songs that will be appropriate please contact the group at <br />
<br />
BirthMotherAppreciation@groups.facebook.com<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjKfIFbb95alG7v8BGS5ihGSZKY2DOusMGV-_ERRCOu2XPmZD-PlS_UsG_mY3OgIJhOjxAb0LI0yrtWuZ_HgXEku9KKw00VD4guOTgibV5UNTpjiMQRWQYBfbZiFfOS9vJyS40VFkZZGE/s1600/BirthMothersAppreciation.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left:1em; margin-right:1em"><img border="0" height="126" width="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjKfIFbb95alG7v8BGS5ihGSZKY2DOusMGV-_ERRCOu2XPmZD-PlS_UsG_mY3OgIJhOjxAb0LI0yrtWuZ_HgXEku9KKw00VD4guOTgibV5UNTpjiMQRWQYBfbZiFfOS9vJyS40VFkZZGE/s320/BirthMothersAppreciation.jpg" /></a></div>Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-39066452697007241092011-04-17T19:48:00.000-07:002011-04-17T19:49:43.497-07:00ONE COUPLE, ONE ANGEL, ONE HEARTA couple is sealed at the alter, for time and eternity<br />
With a love that will not falter.<br />
<br />
A couple begins their journey through life,<br />
To start a family becomes their great strife.<br />
<br />
A child is conceived within the womb,<br />
A child passes on only to soon.<br />
<br />
A couple continues to shed tear after tear, for conceiving,<br />
Another child takes year after year.<br />
<br />
A couple then journeys down another path,<br />
Perhaps not flesh nor of bone but<br />
In the end, still their own.<br />
<br />
An angel appears from out of the blue,<br />
With something precious and dear<br />
That nobody knew.<br />
<br />
A couple meets the angel feeling extremely grateful,<br />
For an angel’s prayers are answered because<br />
She was faithful.<br />
<br />
One heart binds them both after meeting a short while,<br />
A couple, an angel, a love for one child.<br />
<br />
From God’s arms, to yours, to mine it will be.<br />
An angel is blessed for God’s eyes will see.<br />
<br />
One couple, one angel joined at the heart,<br />
A child doubly loved and blessed from the start.<br />
<br />
An angel who set forth the last puzzle piece,<br />
For a couple, a child, a love that will never cease. <br />
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To learn more about Birth Mother Baskets please copy and paste the link. <br />
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http://birthmotherbaskets.blogspot.com/Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1290884997557382873.post-66532920707081841912011-04-17T19:43:00.000-07:002011-04-17T19:43:21.410-07:00My Little ButterflyYou were finally here,<br />
My little butterfly.<br />
You were placed in my arms,<br />
And I couldn’t help but cry.<br />
You were so precious so beautiful.<br />
I stared at you with pride.<br />
Your hands so tiny,<br />
Your eyes so bright.<br />
You were finally here,<br />
My little butterfly.<br />
And I knew it would be hard<br />
To say goodbye.<br />
I cried for you at night.<br />
How could I let my<br />
Little butterfly go?<br />
Then I thought of the new world<br />
You will see.<br />
Of the loving parents that will<br />
Take care of thee.<br />
And I felt peace.<br />
You were finally here,<br />
My little butterfly.<br />
And no matter how hard it is,<br />
I must say goodbye.<br />
So, open your wings<br />
And don’t be afraid to fly.<br />
Fly away to a new life.<br />
Where opportunities are<br />
At every door.<br />
And my love around every corner.<br />
You were finally here,<br />
My little butterfly.<br />
But, quickly you left<br />
To live your new life.<br />
You’ll always be in my heart.<br />
Your memory in my every thought.<br />
Those tiny hands,<br />
And bright eyes.<br />
I will forever love you,<br />
My Little Butterfly. © gina 2000<br />
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http://birthmotherbaskets.blogspot.com/Ashley-Dalys Crapohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03217047855517862675noreply@blogger.com0